Crisscross (by Barbara)

Summary:    A bit of banter.  Hutch tries to solve a crossword.
Category:  Starsky & Hutch
Genre:  Crime
Rated:  PG
Word Count:  605


“Whatcha got there, Hutch?”

“I’m doing the crossword puzzle.”

“Crossword puzzle?”


“I’ve never seen you do a crossword puzzle before.”

“Starsky. There’s lots of things I do that you don’t know about.”

“No there isn’t. I know everything you do and I’ve never seen you do a crossword puzzle before.”

“I do them when I have time.”

“What makes you think you have time now? We have all this paper work to do.”

“No WE don’t have paper work to do, YOU have paperwork to do, MY paperwork is done. See the nice, neat pile.”

“Oh. It is a nice, neat pile alright.”

“Remember what Dobey said. DAILY reports not WEEKLY reports. If the man wanted weekly reports we’d have to do them every week. These are daily reports which means we have to do them everyday.”

“Teacher’s pet.”

“Just do’in my job Starsk. Just doin’ my job.”

“Okay, okay. I get the point. So?”

“So what?”

“Give me a clue.”


“A clue. Give me a clue from da crossword puzzle.”

“Awww. I like to do it myself, Starsky.”

“You can’t do anything without me, now give me a clue.”

“Can’t? I can’t do anything without you?”


“I can think of a few things.”

“Come on Hutch… give me a clue.”

“<sigh>… okay. This should be interesting.”

“Hey! I can do crosswords.”

“Sure you can Starsk… sure you can.”

“I CAN.”

“Alright. Don’t get upset.”

“I’m not upset. Now just give me a damn clue, will ya? I’ll show you I can do crosswords.”

“Okay… ummmm. Six letter word for ‘soak up’.”

“Soak up, soak up… suck?”

“That’s a four letter word, turkey.”

“Oh, aaaah… how about… ABSORB!”

“That could work. You’re probably right, Starsk.”

“HA! Gimme another one.”

“Okay. Let’s see. One down… ‘Greek theaters’. Four letters. Starts with ‘O’ ending in ‘A”.”

“Greek theaters?”


“Have you got anything else around it?”

“Yes. The ‘A’ from ‘absorb’.”

“Oh. Well, give me something else.”

“Not up on you Greek theater, huh.”


“Okay. Defrost. Four-letter word for defrost. Ends in ‘W’.”



“I told you I was good.”

“Those were easy. How about ‘Fine point’. Six letter word for ‘Fine point’.”

“Are they talking about a pen?”

“I don’t know. That’s part of the game.”

“Oh yeah… right… ‘Fine point’.”

“Forget about that one. How about… ‘prone to complaining’ – five letters. You should get this one, Starsk.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Meaning you whine.”


“What’s it?”

“A five letter word for ‘prone to complaining’ – whiny. HA!”

“Okay. All right. That’s pretty good, Starsk… here’s a tricky clue for you. Actor Byrnes.”

“That would be Ed.”

“Right but with two D’s.”

“Two D’s? Thats just dumb. Who spells Ed with two D’s?”

“Edd Byrnes does.”

“One more clue and then we’ve gotta get this paper work done.”

“Not WE… YOU!”

“Okay, okay me.”

“I just need one more anyway and I can’t get it.”

“There, you see. What did I tell you? You can’t do anything without me.”


“What’s the clue Hutch, old buddy?”

“Turn tail.”

“How many letters?”


“Have you got any letters?”

“Something, something… IC ending with T.”

“Chicken out.”

“That’s it. That’s it Starsky. How did you get that?”

“Easy. I already helped Minnie with the crossword this morning.”

“You’re really something you know that?”

“I know.”

“Will you please finish YOUR paper work so YOU can drive ME home.”

“Sure. Why didn’t you say so.”

“You know, Gordo. You are really high maintenance.”

“Yes I am, Hutch. Yes I am. But I am sooooo worth it.”

***The End***

Return to Barbara’s homepage

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.